The wind and the water

When no one is speaking except the wind and the water, you begin to hear with the elements of your being.

Stars exploding. Then hydrogen, carbon, oxygen, and the other elements – coming back together to form the world. And you and me.

But long before conscious awareness. Before male and female. Before words. The wind and the water were speaking. Have been speaking. Perhaps they began by singing. A deep breath becoming music. A song? Could what I am hearing be a song? How could I – so very, very young – how could I possibly know?

And yet when there are no sounds but the wind and the water, I begin to listen.

How could I hear the song? A song? The sounds are very, very old. And living. 

… hhhaaaeeeiiiooouussshhh …

Singing.

Softly against my cheek.

Singing.

Whispering.

Singing.

Song without self-awareness …

And my mind chatters on. What am I – this stutter of me? What am I missing? I barely have ears.

But when no other voices but the wind and the water are speaking, I begin to hear with the elements of my being.

I begin again.

What if what I am hearing is this? But what am I hearing? Wait. What if? But when the only sounds are the wind and the water trying to make up their minds, there really is no need for me to interrupt. It is enough for me to make eye contact with a drifting cloud. Or nearby, the ripples on the sky-reflecting lake at my feet. The sun winks at me as if it knows something about what the wind and the water are saying. I should listen. I should listen. But I feel as if I should say something. I feel … I want to join the conversation. But what human word would belong?

I make a few notes for myself. Perhaps I could send a card: to whom it may concern. Later. Much later. I should listen. Begin to listen. Maybe one day I could find utterance worthy of their conversation, but I think that I am not old enough yet for what the wind and the water are saying. Their thoughts are too subtle and enduring for words. And maybe they are singing.

I don’t understand.

I listen. I begin to listen. I am drifting off. Naptime for me. Let the old ones continue their conversation. The wind and the water…

Maybe it is a song. One very long song. Could it be a song?

How would I know? My mind keeps trying to say something, but only manages a few fragmentary words. But when no one else is making a sound but the wind and the water, I begin to hear something with the elements of my being.

**

And this recording barely captures the sounds I heard. And now that moment - many moments - are merely memory. But perhaps I will listen to the wind and the water again. Who knows?

added video: Listening to water